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Panel Questions

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Right now, panel, it is time for you to answer some questions about this week's news. Peter, finally, we've been waiting for it - a solution to climate change. A piece in Bloomberg News this week proposes what as an effective way to stop the warming of the planet?

PETER GROSZ: Is it something - it's not something super dark about, like, climate change...

SAGAL: Well, in fact, it will make it super dark.

GROSZ: Oh. Destroy the sun.

SAGAL: (Laughter) Well, that would do it - not quite that extreme. It'll be nice to sit in the shade everywhere.

GROSZ: Block the rays from the sun with a giant - one of those, like, SunSetter awnings that comes out from the side of your house.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Exactly. All of a sudden...

GROSZ: Yeah.

SAGAL: ...The Earth puts on that big tinfoil thing with sunglasses on it...

GROSZ: Yeah.

HELEN HONG: (Laughter).

SAGAL: ...Just like a windshield. That's right.

GROSZ: Yeah.

SAGAL: The suggestion is to block out the sun.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

GROSZ: Like Mr. Burns said in "The Simpsons" when he says...

SAGAL: Exactly right. The idea, however, didn't come from "The Simpsons." It came from the time Michael Bloomberg stood behind someone who was 5 foot, 6 inches tall at a Neil Diamond concert and couldn't see anything.

(LAUGHTER)

HONG: Who - so it's like a giant, like, awning slash - who is going to be holding this thing? Like, where is this thing going to be...

SAGAL: Well, let me explain.

HONG: What is this thing going to be attached to?

SAGAL: Let me explain. What we would do, according to this article, is simulate a massive global volcano by releasing sulfur dioxide into the stratosphere, which would then spread around the Earth - because if movies have taught us anything, it's that the skies darken right before good things happen.

HONG: (Laughter).

ALONZO BODDEN: My real question is, if it's a giant global volcano, isn't that scheduled for, like, two weeks from now?

SAGAL: Exactly.

BODDEN: Aren't we just...

SAGAL: Just wait.

BODDEN: Isn't that the next plague that's going to hit us? The giant volcano goes off.

GROSZ: No. You know what's going to happen next is aliens are going to come, and we're going to be, like, this is just the worst time. This is not - this - just...

BODDEN: We haven't groomed in months.

GROSZ: Give us, like, a year.

HONG: (Laughter).

SAGAL: You know, what's going to happen is...

GROSZ: Everybody looks terrible.

SAGAL: ...The aliens are going to come and say, take us to your leader, and we're going to go, no.

GROSZ: Yeah.

SAGAL: Just no.

GROSZ: We actually don't have a leader right now.

SAGAL: Yeah.

GROSZ: Well, it's more of a loose collective, that there's no, like...

SAGAL: (Laughter).

GROSZ: ...Centralized leader. So I really - I could show you to Phyllis (ph). Phyllis is great.

(SOUNDBITE OF THE BEATLES SONG, "HERE COMES THE SUN")

SAGAL: Coming up, our panelists chow down in our Bluff the Listener game. Call 1-888-WAIT-WAIT to play. We'll be back in a minute with more of WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME from NPR. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.

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