Bluff The Listener
BILL KURTIS: From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME, the NPR news quiz. I'm Bill Kurtis. We are playing this week with Roxanne Roberts, Luke Burbank and Joel Kim Booster. And here again is your host at the Chase Bank Auditorium in downtown Chicago, Peter Sagal.
PETER SAGAL, HOST:
Thank you, Bill.
SAGAL: Right now, it's time for the WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME Bluff the Listener game. Call 1-888-WAIT-WAIT to play our game on the air.
Hi, you're on WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME.
ANDREW KIEL: Hi. This is Andrew from Rock Hill, S.C.
SAGAL: So - oh, South Carolina. So you, I imagine, have been inundated with candidates, right?
KIEL: We have. It's interesting. They're popping up left and right. There's actually, I think, one just - several this week in the past, like, five hours.
SAGAL: Have you run into any of them at your diners or wherever you simple folk like to hang out?
KIEL: I have not run into them in any coffee shops yet. But...
KIEL: It's not over.
SAGAL: It's not over yet. Well, welcome to the show, Andrew. You're going to play the game in which you must try to tell truth from fiction. Bill, what's Andrew's topic?
KURTIS: You're such a sellout.
SAGAL: No one likes a sellout, but integrity won't buy you that beach house, will it? This week, we heard about someone who really traded their principles in for cold, hard cash. Our panelists are going to tell you about it. Pick the real one, you'll win our prize - the WAIT WAITer of your choice on your voicemail. Ready to play?
KIEL: I am.
SAGAL: First, let's hear from Joel Kim Booster.
JOEL KIM BOOSTER: There's an old saying in show business - you either die a hero, or you live long enough to become a spokesperson for a major corporate entity. The next in a long line of big-name sellouts might shock some fans as Sinead O'Connor, the singer many will remember for ripping apart a picture of Pope John Paul II in her now infamous 1992 "Saturday Night Live" performance, can be seen in an ad for Staples office supplies.
BOOSTER: In the ad, the Irish-born singer holds up a picture of the pope but no longer has the finger strength to tear it. Instead, she feeds it into a handhold paper shredder...
BOOSTER: ...While singing a version of her hit "Nothing Compares 2 U." But the U isn't you. It's the handheld paper shredder. The response has been decidedly mixed, with some older viewers unable to let go of their vision of O'Connor as a sacrilegious fire-starter, while many more are too young to even understand why the video has gone viral in the first place. Who's that lady, one YouTube commented. Is the joke that her hair got caught in the shredder?
BOOSTER: The controversy or mystery hasn't seemed to bother the office supply retailer. When pressed for comment, Michael Hurwitz, senior VP of marketing and merchandising for the company, stated simply, we're a fan of Ms. O'Connor's music, and we're thrilled that there has been so much interest around handheld document shredders. The pope, however, just said, again?
SAGAL: Sinead O'Connor appears in a commercial...
SAGAL: ...For Staples using a paper shredder to tear up a picture of the pope. Your next story of someone cashing in comes from Roxanne Roberts.
ROXANNE ROBERTS: If you walked into Bloomingdale's lingerie department in the last few days, you might have seen a sexy push-up bra called the Gloria, named for feminist icon Gloria Steinem, a woman better known for burning bras than selling them. But yes, the 85-year-old legend has teamed up with AARP and Maidenform to launch her first brassiere...
ROBERTS: ...Specifically designed for, quote, "red-hot grandmamas."
ROBERTS: I used to say that a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle, she told the New York Times. At my advanced age, I've come to realize that a sexy fish sometimes wants a sexy bicycle.
ROBERTS: Steinem, who famously went undercover as a Playboy bunny in 1963, explains she's never been against bras per se, just the boring ones that look like straitjackets. The Gloria comes in three colors - nude, red and black - and two styles, a sports bra and a push-up which, says Steinem, lifts my breasts back to where I can see them.
ROBERTS: All proceeds for the bra, which sells for $50, go to free mammograms for elderly women.
SAGAL: Gloria Steinem...
SAGAL: ...Endorsing a push-up bra. Your last story of soul-selling comes from Luke Burbank.
LUKE BURBANK: Bone, bone, bone, bone. Bone, bone, bone, bone.
BURBANK: Now tell me what you're going to do when judgment comes for you. If you've got two ears and a heart, you know that's the opening line from the song "Crossroads" by '90s hip-hop sensation Bone Thugs-N-Harmony. But it turns out the band recently faced a different version of that question. Tell me what you're going to do when Buffalo Wild Wings comes for you.
The answer was announced this week. They're officially changing their name from Bone Thugs-N-Harmony to Boneless Thugs-N-Harmony as part of a marketing stunt for Buffalo Wild Wings - or just B-dubs if you're my friend Camaro Kev. And that's not all. The individual band members are changing their names, too. Krayzie Bone will become Krayzie Boneless. Flesh-n-Bone will become Flesh-n-Boneless. And Wish Bone will become Brian (ph).
BURBANK: Just kidding. He'll be Wish Boneless. The only holdout is member Layzie Bone who is quoted as saying, quote, "I ain't changing [expletive]."
BURBANK: "Changing our name to boneless is preposterous" - end quote. Despite the holdout, Boneless Thugs-N-Harmony merch will be going on sale soon at the restaurant chain, including T-shirts, hats and gold chains with a boneless chicken on them. No word yet on if the partnership will seep into the music of Boneless Thugs. But if they put out a song called, "Why Did I Order These Wings So Hot? God, I'm Sweating. Can I Please Have Some More Bleu Cheese Or Something To Dip Them In?..."
BURBANK: ...It's probably a marketing thing.
SAGAL: All right.
SAGAL: Somebody - somebody, Andrew, sold out. Was it, from Joel Kim Booster, Sinead O'Connor, who now tears up her picture of the pope with a handy handheld paper shredder from Staples? From Roxanne Roberts, was it Gloria Steinem, who has now endorsed her own branded push-up bra? Or, from Luke Burbank, the hip-hop group Bone Thugs-N-Harmony is now Boneless Thugs-N-Harmony to promote Buffalo Wild Wings. Which of these is the real story of a sellout in the news?
KIEL: Well, having just come from a chicken restaurant - it wasn't Buffalo Wild Wings - I'm going to go with C, the Buffalo Wild Wings, bone, bone, bone.
SAGAL: You're going to go for the Boneless Thugs-N-Harmony story from Luke Burbank. Well, we spoke to somebody who is involved with the real story.
SETH FREEMAN: Bone Thugs-N-Harmony changed their name to Boneless Thugs-N-Harmony because our boneless wings are so good.
SAGAL: That was Seth Freeman.
SAGAL: He's the chief marketing officer at Buffalo Wild Wings. Congratulations, Andrew. You got it right. You earned a point for Luke. You've won our prize - the voice of your choice on your voicemail. Congratulations.
KIEL: Thank you.
SAGAL: Thank you, Andrew.
SAGAL: Thanks for playing. Watch out for the candidates.
BURBANK: I'll see you at the crossroads, Andrew. Bye-bye.
(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "THE CROSSROADS")
BONE THUGS-N-HARMONY: (Singing) Bone, bone, bone, bone, bone, bone, bone, bone, bone. Now tell me whatcha gonna do when there ain't nowhere to run? When judgement comes... Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.